madrama....madrama...madrama..tsk.tsk..
cinematheque
Have you experienced going out of town without planning to the extent of without bringing anything? Well we did and it’s fun!
That was December of 2008 when we planned to go to Mall of Asia to watch Iskul Bukol for our late Christmas get together. I brought my usual stuff: atm, cell phone and jacket. I went to Plainview to meet up with friends and on my way there I received a text message saying that there will be some change of plans. We will just stay at home have few drinks and watch DVD which I think would be fine. Suddenly they were talking about going somewhere else. They wanted to eat bulalo so they wouldn’t feel the hang over the next day and the perfect spot for that would be in Tagaytay. All the while they were convincing me and no worries about it as long as everyone’s happy and not too far anyway. A friend arrived with her huge baggage and she thought that we were going to Baguio. I smell a bit of misunderstanding, you know how fickle minded girls are and as to not spoil her momentum of going to Baguio, we decided to join her instead. On our way there we were all laughing thinking that in a snap of a finger we were all heading to Baguio City! The only condition that I gave them is that we needed to go back to Manila at 2pm the next day for obvious reasons that I was not prepared and I didn’t bring anything with me at all. The funny thing and I think the exciting part was when I decided to go straight to SAGADA. It has always been my dream, wish granted, we conquered SAGADA! We traveled more than five hours but everything was worth it. I was seated right next to a man whom I think was a member of a religious group and on our way to Baguio; their group initiated to lead a prayer. There are really people who care about everyone’s safety. He even offered his seat so I would feel comfortable. I anticipated that later on he'll unconsciously need my shoulders when he would fall asleep. These were the little cute, simple, and memorable things that you would notice when you're on a weekend getaway like this one.
I think it was also a perfect timing since I haven’t been on vacation for so long. We were all exhausted from work, family pressure, and love life. It was a perfect place for anyone who’s in need of space to breathe out, everything’s beautiful. Sunrise, sunset, people are very warm, rice wine is so good! Yoghurt and even the billboard of yoghurt house were so cute! Even the darkness, it was beautiful for me. At one point in our lives we’ve come to forget everything about Manila.
I’ve proven that my being impulsive is contagious because I made things happen overnight. Good thing that I am not the only one impulsive in our group. These people are the ones’ that I met way back but we haven’t given a chance to know one another that much. We have lots of differences when it comes to personal issues, views and opinions. We all came from different walks of life and I am happy that I know how I am in terms of being with old and new friends and even with new acquaintances.
We’ve come to meet people from different race and it’s really nice to at least once in a while socialize and be interested in other peoples’ culture and belief. You would learn from them and vice versa. It’s true that when it comes to accomplishments, there’s no color. We met Sebastian from France who’s a well traveled man and he talked about his love life and craft, how his girlfriends left him because they can’t stand his being adventurous. He talked about his life in Cambodia where he lived for over a month and his goal was to experience all the hardship and he believed that it will help him to live his life to the fullest back in France. He learned to give importance to simple things and he’s very confident that he can live anywhere in this world.
is also one great experience that will stay in my heart forever. I was so excited and eager upon entering the cave, it was so easy for me and as we moved on, the tourist guide with his one lamp reminded us as much as I could remember we will be entering five stages and there are stages that we cannot go back. Either we will continue with the group or go back to where we started all by ourselves. In the middle, there was a part that you have to go down, you have to have a technique either you slide yourself or do it facing the wall it’s up to you. One wrong move and you will fall to 6 feet cold water. Worst part is that we don’t have a life vest and I don’t know how to swim. That has been my deciding factor that I told “kuya tourist guide” that I can’t continue anymore. I can’t do it. That’s when he said that we only have one lamp and there’s a different route going back. One of my sorority sisters Joys was hesitant as well. It’s hard especially when you cannot carry your weight. Allie, fell down. Good thing that Lyme was there to catch her. So I said okay, if I can do this you have to do this as well. If you’re going then I’ll be going. So everyone went on and we succeeded. I can only enter it once and as much as I wanted to do it again I know that, that wouldn’t happen. Why? Because, I did not even know how I survived that cave. That is so magical for me and it made me have faith again.
Everyone celebrated and we found ourselves drinking rice wine and smb with French Sebastian and two Austrians or American I guess but it doesn’t matter! We were all laughing when we asked Sebastian: “do you believe that San Miguel Beer is the best beer in the whole world?” He answered no,no.no,no! We have the best liquors in France!
We started our friendship in SAGADA and what happened in SAGADA would always remind us that everything is possible. Live your life to the fullest, explore and believe. Appreciate everything and everyone you have. Keep in mind that “Change is the only thing that is permanent in this world.”
I was redecorating my restaurant city in face book when one of my deleted friends popped up. One of the moments that I never ever thought would happen again. He’s there with the usual statement howdy? I was tempted to click report as spam but his charisma was really amazing. I remember when one of my closest friends shared her story how this guy corrected her ym status that instead of appreciating what he did, that made her offended. I cannot blame her but that was really offensive especially knowing that they’re not that close and they’re not friends either. Going back, I just remember how I hated him for a period of time. Let’s call him hotdog so it won’t be obvious since I know that there are people connected to him trying to invade my blog. I won’t forget that incident when he asked me to remove one of my posts. At the back of my head I was like saying “who are you to tell me what to do?” and I realized that it was our conversation that I posted and the next day I found myself deleting everything. Yesterday I deleted the whole blog that I am using since college. Hotdog is one of my treasured friends. And I was asking myself what if he talks to me again? But then again I know that he wouldn’t do because he can see me whenever I am online, he’s talking to my friend but not to me. So I know he was waiting for me to reply and I know that he’s confident. I told myself the conversation should only be all casual and civil….there he goes..there he goes again, pulsing thru my veins, and I just can’t contain, this feeling that remains. So as I talked to him i felt that the conversation went on smoothly without angst. Until I found my self asking him about the correct punctuation marks and he was asking me to join his business network. “Hotdog, if joining the network would mean seeing you again, thanks but no thanks….=D
June 7th, 2009 by apo-ni-beatres
One thing that I realized as I continue to grow older is to be more sensitive towards other people. To put one self in the situation of the other person is also a way so we can be more sensitive to how and as to what they feel. We usually encounter in our daily lives situation wherein we do not know how we can deliver something negative to someone where in the other person will not be that offended or will not get hurt at all. How can we say something that is not so pleasant, especially if the other person is not broad minded or worst not open-minded? Being open is okay but most often than not it leads to misunderstanding. Whether we accept it or not, sometimes we have to keep sensitive issues to ourselves before we share it even to the closest person in your family or circle of friends. First things first you should have time to ask yourself if you can explain the issue well. You have to keep in mind that we are accountable to everything that we say and do. Misunderstandings are very natural to everyone mostly if the people involved are the ones that are dear to you. A negative feedback will always be negative even if you deliver it in a nice way. Imagine saying bullshit, bitch, or asshole to someone in a soft or polite manner. It did not change the meaning right? The bottom line is, you always have to think twice before you say something. You have to weigh things first. You have to make sure, if you can stand the attitude of the other person, if he/she is open to criticisms. Bear in mind that each one is a different person and we all have our flaws. Let us site an example; bubbly individuals are not bubbly all the time. There are times that they also feel that they want sometime alone for themselves. So if we encounter scenarios that we wanted to talk to someone and we are not sure yet if the person will take or accept whatever that you are about to say, we can always start by talking to that person in a light manner. Do it one on one. Not with a group of friends, unless these people are all involve. Avoid doing it in a drinking session because apparently the tendency is that most of you will be too emotional to discuss sensitive issues and again it will lead to misunderstanding. You will either get misunderstood or vice versa. You can always feel the mood of the other person, if you think that she is in the mood then grab the chance but always put on top of your head that in every circumstance there will always be a positive and a negative outcome. The least that you can do is to be honest and straightforward but not mean. Remember that being straightforward is going directly to the point and being mean is going over board. Above all these, ask for Gods’ wisdom in whatever decision that you are about to do.
A prayer to share with you:
God,grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change;the courage to accept the things i can; and the wisdom to know the difference
Shon is free and so am I.
I ended what I have with Shon, my ex for 2 months. I realized then that I am not learning and I am losing everything that I learned before. He showed me how much he loved me but love alone is not enough. We have not had serious conversation that is very important for me. From all the men that I have been with, as much as possible I do not obliged them to make me their first priority. All I want is an open communication and an assurance that I am the only one. I do not ask for dates, I am not into celebrating monthsarries, I do not ask for gifts and I do not even let men court me. If I do not like you, ill tell it straight that all I can offer is friendship, but if I like you ill say yes and from there, we will get to know one another .Simple. Easy. Relaxed. Steady. With him, he sees me whenever he needs something, whenever he misses me, and he does not make time for me. I tried so hard to understand that he is too young and that he has other priorities but the question is where am I there. He was never my ideal man. Every one around me sees him as drop dead gorgeous. Again, he has never been my ideal man. I let go of him because of things that we can actually avoid, things that we can work on but he was never been man enough to face it. I once asked for a second chance but the only thing that I heard from him was I think this is not the perfect time for us. So there, we parted ways. I never cried. I did not curse him because I believe that its every man’s right to decide whether he wanted to stay or not. Whatever it is that he has on mind, I will not intercede. After all, I was the one who provoked him to leave everything behind including me.
I do not hate him that is for sure. His family welcomed me and that is one thing that I am most proud about our relationship. I will keep it forever.
I received a text message asking for a second chance. I know that it will happen. However, I do not think that he knows what he likes as of this time. Maybe he is just missing me for now. I asked him why he needed to wait for months before he realized that he wants me back, and the answer did not convince me.
Well after losing the two most important things in my life, I am ready to face someone.
Someone whom I dreamed of seeing for two years I guess.
Small world it is, Shon heading towards me. I think there are almost 200 people inside the bar but still he saw me.
As what they always say, you will know that you are over someone when you get to see the person and you have not felt anything.
Well unfortunately, I am trying to refresh my feelings but there is no more spark at all.
What if? Maybe that second chance will just cover up the emotion that I feel for someone else.
I missed Shon but that would not be enough to continue what we had.
I am easy to get I know that but not for the second time.
As what I always say, men who have been part of me would meet someone beautiful, smart, and sexy than I am but they will not encounter someone exactly like me because women that they are trying to get are all the same and I am different.
God, I feel like hell tonight
Tears of rage I cannot fight (should be lie)
I’d be the last to help you understand
Are you strong enough to be my man?
Nothing’s true and nothing’s right
So let me be alone tonight
Cause you can’t change the way I am
Are you strong enough to be my man?
Lie to me
I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me
But please don’t leave
I have a face I cannot show
I make the rules up as I go
Just try and love me if you can
Are you strong enough to be my man?
When I’ve shown you that I just don’t care
When I’m throwing punches in the air
When I’m broken down and I can’t stand
Would you be MAN ENOUGH to be my man?
Lie to me
I promise I’ll believe
Lie to me
But please don’t leave
^_^
i have to tell honestly i dunno what’s going on in between,it seems like maybe you’re not into..maybe I'm into..both big maybes,i don't have the guts to ask,i don't have the guts to see you either..you left three buzzes on my ym and what does that mean Dear?malamang wala lang.syet imissedyou so.ayoko to
http://www.soundclick.com/traumaligno.
shrimppaste soda
trauMaligno
I don’t wanna talk to you anymore
No more will I waste your time
Don’t want another thought of your smile
I don’t wanna think of you anymore
The time that your hands held mine
It’s boggling every thought in my mind
You’re so fine, you used to be mine
Then again, perhaps I’d tow back the line
Which way? Who’s to say?
I don’t want to lie to me anymore
That things are gonna be alright
The things that keep me up all night
I don’t wanna talk to you anymore
No more will I waste my time
You’ll never see me beg for your smile
Latigo
(Boom Dizon)
Nalimutan ko nang mataranta
Nawala kang muli
Hindi ko tatanungin
Hindi nawawala ang hindi hinahanap
Panong mapapagod ang dati nang pagal
Hindi malilimot ang di mo naintindihan
Humalik sa himpapawid
Arukin ang di maabot
Malayong babalik ka pa
Pumipiglas ang lubid
Yayapos ang alipin
Umaatras
Ang oras
Kapag ika’y nawawala
Nalimutan mo nang magsalita
At tulad ng huli
Purihin ang salarin
Hindi nabibigo ang di nangangahas
Santong pinapako, kumalinga ng wagas
Magsisi’t tumalikod wala ka nang babalikan
